COS' WE ARE WINNERS FOREVER

Im so slacker x) could have gone training both yest and today (im not very busy) but i was tempted by my bed each time! Grr except that thursday was the sofa instead of my bed xP I feel so guilty, everyone else is dying of stress, bothering about CCAs (i just heard a load of complains), exams, projects, studying and all. They don't have enough time. Why do i not make use of my time! Gahh but it's a good life x)

Acty yest there was a group talk (9 people) with a person from NIE/NTU. She talked to us about school, personal life, family, peers. All the stuff about stress and worries and blah. Though it wasn't supposed to be a counselling session, i think it was really cool! I mean it was good for all of us. We could get it all off and people listened and understood and all. =) i am happy i went for it. They should have this kind of things for everyone, like in small groups to talk. And it's all private and confidential! Yay i feel better now. Hmm. But i felt very guilty, everyone was complaining about not enough time and too much stress and studying, and here i am wasting my time away o.0 sigh...

Shall force myself to go training tomorrow! Heard rugby really sucks in RI. All of them in that screwed up CCA hate it and many quit hur. Poor things, i can sympathise. After all i hated water polo and there was nothing wrong with the coaches or people but i just felt so bad just dragging myself down to each session. And their coach is horrible and unreasonable! Im glad i quit polo though =) But i worry for my CCA (points and more)! Gahh maybe i shouldnt hav quit and got used to it but...

Deleted my previous post, gosh i sounded so horribly mean! ...... haha ANYWAY omg! Lang u are sooo freaking pro. Prefect AND house captain! Wow i bet my savings ur gonna get whatever scholarship u want next time. And when u do, take the medicine one! Yay cos it rocks xP But gahh my parents said that if i do not get a scholarship, they wont pay for me to take medicine =( Sniff i think they're just lying, trying to motivate me to work hard but... It's no use anyway! Haha i am the biggest slacker lying around x) Wahh u make me feel sooooo jealous. Haha congrats go kick ass! (though bayley will win next year AGAIN xP)

I find my social life falling apart. I find everyone catching up with me. Why? What am i doing wrong? Im already trying my best...

We played polo today! YAY. haha we went there at 7.15 to play first, then when leonard came, he took the ball away and said after we finished the program then we could play. And in the end, the program went cutcutcut! Haha it was so slack. Goodie esp since i was feeling horribly unfit. My body like died after 300! Gosh after half the warm up, i was struggling to pull and all. Sigh i noe im seriously weak and unfit =( I mean for pulling i am ALWAYS LAST. That's so sad, it's like suddenly im so slow, and after like 200 even with my very very slow speed (im pulling damn hard) my arms die =( WHY? Sniff i hate it, i hate being so... WEAK. Lol and for the push up test, i think i got the lowest of all the boys, i even lost to mayumi >.< Gosh i feel so sad. I wanna be stronger ;(

Anyways exams are coming! And we still hav class play, atom bomb kit project, and 3 gorges dam (damn!) project to do. Shucks the teachers are crazy, esp ms lim. The dam project is gonna be so tediously difficult! Haha any homework to do today? Hmm must motivate myself gahh and my parents have placed a 9.30 computer curfew on me! **** i can tuse the com after 9.30 and frankly i think that that's pretty ridiculous. Haha but doable, after all i start my work at around 8-10 each night until at the latest 1 am. So um 5 hours! Can right? Esp if i dont get distracted (i always do and half my time is wasted) by msn, blogs and fiction press! Sigh must stop slacking from now on.

Sec 3 course options! Hah we had the briefing in the morning before the express stream. Why? Anyway after that we had to stay back for class project! Gahh but it was funfun. We split up into cast and crew. The crew did ropes and sticks and building. Fun i never knew scouts were so capable o.0. Hmm then we had fun tying each other up with the twine and blah.

Hehe took the train home and was late for the lunch =( Well cos in the first place, nobody bothered to tell me that there even was lunch provided! Peck didnt noe too and we were like the first few to sign up. -frown- i wont be bothered next time. Well then midget meet was fun =) Haha and jiajie is a friendly guy i just realised. After all i only knew him today! Haha he made friends with like ten other helpers too, really nice. -nods- and mayumi is a cold blooded cruel murderer! Whew i could hardly escape her. Midget meet was funfunfun! We had like lunch, and two refreshments in the bowling alley. I was bloated xP And on top of that, i bought hotdog and f&n grape! Im a pig.

It was very rushed though we had like 6-8 com stewards. And soo samm we didnt manage to bully ____. Sigh it was so sad it would have been fun with only 3 com stewards =) But we had like 2 at the lanes, 2/3 at the bowling alley area, and 3 at the reporting area. The parents were rushing us, leonard was getting increasingly angry, and the swimmers' parents were complaining to us! Grrr so annoying then once i was left alone at the bowling alley cos uncle eugene asked for 2 swimmers to serve drinks and ben and peck went off. I had like 3 heats with me to sort out and bother. One being brought to me to organise. Another boy was asking me to fix his broken goggles. While i was figuring out how to fix it, i turned around. And saw that there were no swimmers at the lanes! >.< Gosh i was multi-tasking. And dying. i rushed them to the lanes. Two heats. And uncle eugene came to ask about their absence (the swimmers decided they wanted to eat at the deli instead). Haha relay was even worse, the competition was held up many times cos leonard was late with his swimmers and all. In the end we were like 1 hr 20 min behind time.

Oh and once when i was taking one lane for the medley relay, putting the board for the backstroke, i finished then turned around. When i looked back, the backstroker was swimming back! Wah lau everyone was like what!! And so there were two swimmers swimming in one lane haha. There were like a million dqs today! AND SSC LOST! Oh no! For like the first time in a long long time? Sigh but csc is really pro. I think they're gonna be the first in Spore next time.

Ends this fun day =) Dunno what to take! Hist or geog? My hist score is higher, but my geog is okay i think geog will be more fun... Anyway lit is a nono!

Today was sla~ack. Haha slack slack everything everything. Firstly school was um, first period PE water polo and swimming! Haha second period was a free period cos lin lao shi didnt come. Third period was just watching a movie called Science with the Swastika for General Science. Fourth period was RE was a talk given by Mr Otto Fong on comics (incidentally, some of them were really sick). So it was slack slack slack!

Haha then ate kfc for lunch, went back home and slept. Still felt like dead slab of meat but i dragged myself to training. And well slacked the day away! Haha i love this kind of slacky days =) Except that id rather i wasn't so tired, i had to sleep on the train >.<

Yes it was confirmed! I failed (i think i did) oral comm!! What a waste of money. My edusave! Haha but he's gonna give me a retest along with some other people the next lesson =( and i dont want a retest, id rather leave it. Such a bother, after all id definitely get a bronze even if i fail right? -.-" Sigh and English was fun! We had LT1 for the lesson to rehearse! Yeah this idea of class play is certainly fun haha. We work as a class and get the same marks so it's just a matter of which class does better =) Think 2P will come up with smth sick again? xP hope not haha or they'll fail.

Could be New York maybe Hollywood

Today slept rather than go swimming =( Shame on me! Haha but i was reeallyy tired and all. It was like for Chinese lesson, everyone was dozing off then suddenly lin lao shi (for those who dont noe, she doesnt really teach us all the esam stuff and ke4, during lessons we do more of life values and experiences and chinese literature. Her classes are all really fun and our class still trashes for chinese! xP she rocks) says "blah blah seeing zi yao and tze ern (we were sitting in the front row sleeping) sleeping, i feel very hurt." (translated from chinese) We both liked jerked awake and were liked oops. After that she ordered half the class to go wash our faces and when we came back, she was showing us pictures from her own online album (like shutterfly). I love her lessons also she loves giving out chocolates too, for reasons like saying something funny, doing well, doing badly or singing a song for the class xP Hmm in geog, during the video, people were openly sleeping in the dark classroom (the lights were off, i was sleeping too) and after the 45 min vid (cntd from last lesson) ms lim commented that half the class was sleeping during the show xP hehe but i really really felt very tired today =( felt like sleeping on the astro turf during flag raising!

Haha i find im trapped in a vicious cycle, sleep late, then next day because im tired i sleep in the aft dont go training. then do hw at night and i cant sleep after all cos off my aft sleep then i sleep late again and blah it goes on. >.<

Today was fun! I think. Well morning music was erm tiring. Gosh i didnt noe Leaving on a Jet Plane by Peter Paul and Mary could be so difficult. Whew haha later robotics was sad. Mr Ang is being fired =( In fact, robotics is being fired. Starting from next year. Sigh and i was singing the sparrow song so much during robotics that Jia Hong was ready to kill me xP Hehe the tanks are fun, but Mr Ang says he has no motivation to teach anymore, hes really sad and doesnt know what to say to his family. In fact the school didnt even tell him why they fired him! So sad and he's such a nice teacher ;( i think we'll all miss him.

CLE was fun! Yeah we had like choosing our career thingies which were very interesting. I found out im more for the social and administrative jobs. Hmmm interesting and later chinese was slack. Haha the whole lesson was just completing the chinese orals! Hehe and english was as usual, slack. Seriously i don't know what there is to learn for lit, you can just go to the exam and crap and get marks -.- Sigh and i never liked lit anyway, so it's either geog or hist! I get higher marks in hist, but i think geogs interesting >.<>I'd rather be a sparrow than a snail
Yes i would
If only i could
I really would

Erm feeling weighed down. Grumpy hmph and when i thought yesterday was the day which i would finish everything. Sigh. Ok today had Chinese Oral, 9.5/10!! Yay ok lin lao shi was way tooo lenient lor, everyone agrees. But then again we all agree too that she is such a nice teacher ^^ Hmm got back elec. and chinese test. OMG i cant believe it, elec i got 7/10 and all because i didnt like trust myself. I put down the correct answer at first, it was like instinctive working. Then i looked at it again and got all confused (with my brilliant working of course xP) and didnt think it was right. So i changed it. =( Sigh and Chinese i got like lowest in class. **** this is like the first time, past few tests i've been getting quite high. I think my tuition teacher will get a heart attack when she hears this. Sigh dunno what happened lar ;( sniff sniff... Shit still cant believe it darn the suo1 duan3 chang2 wen2 i failed? gosh must study harder it pulled all my marks down.

And today we played polo! Yaya there were like 3 classes in the pool lor o.0. Whoa it was a bit crowded, but my team won. I think xP We rock haha and the school pyjamas were rotten. Half of them had like holes in them. Eww imagine using pyjamas used by a thousand other people since the dawn of time. And they could have chosen better than hello kitty pyjamas -.-" It was disgusting gah. But polo was fun mmm. But it lasted such a short time! Sigh.

And for prefect nominees, Jerome, Kevin (eww), and Kartik got in. The people in my class were astounded like WHAT! Gosh teddy and haris should have gotten in rather than kevin and kartik. Somehow nobody can see kevin as a prefect (shudder). Mr Paul Lim must be getting old, or rather he was sucseptible to the flirting antics of kevin mark lee yang (gay?). Bullshit he doesnt even do any group work! His individual work is all LATE. Every single time i could bet on it. But wad bothers me most is that he doesnt do his homework on time or participate in groupwork, and his excuse? Sorry too many CCAs. He-lloo then wouldnt being a prefect make u um, unable to study for ur tests? Dots stupid flirt (he flirts with the male teachers ewww) and slacker. Hmm it really irks me to no end (esp since i openly supported teddy instead of him in his face). Omg i hav no doubt that he might be voted in, but his ability? Responsibility BIG FAT ZERO. Last year he was vice chairman, the class DEMANDED a revote two weeks later cos he never did any of his duties. Wow two weeks and cant cope with being vice chairman o.0

Today he was undone by his own flirting tendencies for Chinese oral. He did it in like a flirtatious manner (people were vomiting all over) and halfway through lin lao shi stopped him and told him he had one more chance to restart. He got 5/10 in the end. Good very good and she gave him 1 extra mark (prob out of pity) for being brave and volunteering to go first. There here's what LYS says and people agree, "Kevin tries to hard to suck up to the teachers" -nods- agrees very much and he tries to hard to not do work too. Slacker shit. Omg i cant believe he'll get voted no darn but i know he will. And if Kartik becomes a prefect. I'll um kill myself. Now already im feeling damn guilty should hav told him NO.

Leonard's bugging my bro to tell me to email him the list of ppl helping out for open midget. Well there's only 4 ppl on it so far? Sigh gotta email him. Overslept today >.< Shucks

History essay to do. Shucks

Add me at my new email okay! purplepaddle@gmail.com The colour doesn't mean anything haha, just ran out of ideas so spare me xP And for those people who i asked to add me and they told me curtly to my face to add them myself, i wont. Stuck up toots (thankfully there's like only one) please if it weren't so messy and tiring to do i would. Just that i hav like 90smth contacts and i cant copy every email over right. Already now im spending time asking u to do it? Fine if u dont wanna talk to me, i dont need to talk to this kind of people too. For those i neglected to ask i'll add u myself. Hmph whew that was a nasty paragraph sorry.

Today was the start of the new week! Oh got my geog test back, it was horrible. Wah lau horribly erm average, or maybe (hopefully not) below average. Gosh i feel so sad. Must study next time wah. Remember sitting for the test and hitting myself on the head cos i knew all those answers could be found in the piles of notes we had >.< Horrid and feeling so sleepy now, but still have Chinese compre, math assignment and Chinese speech! to tend to =(

I AM DAMN BLUR!! Haha ok let's take today for an example. Hmm first thing! To Youth Science Conference today, i was supposed to take the train to school. Amazingly i missed city hall from kallang and went all the way to Tanjong Pagar. I was oops got out changed trains and went back to city hall. Once there i just walked across to the other side not knowing it was the wrong train -.-" i just assumed kae haha. So it took me to Marina Bay and i was frantic by then xP In the end took the train back all the way to Bishan and was late, i held up the bus =( So sad i took four trains today! Garh and once on the stupid bus i realized that i had forgotten my badge!

But on the whole the Youth Science Conference was very fun. Nanyang Polytechnic's Auditorium is so nice!! Like cinema >.< Gah the things were all so cheem and hard to understand =( There was one Hwa Chong guy went up to collect cert and his blazier was ten sizes too big for him, and unbuttoned! Hwa Chong intelligence -.-" Then after the break, we could choose which lecture theatre we wanted to go to. So we went to the auditorium! (Many people only thought that there was only two lecture theatres to go to not the auditorium, so it was VERY empty) Very fun, it was damn informal cos so few people were there and everyone weren't paying attention (the entries were cheem enough but not interesting). So Kevin and the 2L fellow were sleeping away. Jia hong and Tze Ern were playing on the handphone and writing on a piece of paper. I was reading The Dark Tower: Book Five! Yay couldnt resist, though i did try to pay attention =) So i took the train home later with Ern.

The talk was BORING. And dinner and natalie's birthday was fun. Mmmm haha after the delicious cake, the others were in the games room. Then at the bowling alley, ben ho and tze kang were playing with the candles lighting them all up, with me, nat and her mum watching. Suddenly kang put a napkin on the candles and it burst into fire!! Unsurprisingly, benh ran away immediately -.-" Nat was screaming and i blew at the burning napkin. THEN half of it flew on to kang!! Omg i was horrified, he jumped up and started brushing himself frantically xP While nat continued screaming and i was laughing -.-" Haha it was Far-nee. So sorry Kang xP Lucky the carpet didn't burn hur. DDR was fun, though i fell hmph dont laugh!

Wah haha see how blur i am! Grr xP

Back to school! Choo choo. And the train crashed. It wasnt really fun hur. First lesson math realised that i had done badly for my last term's test (as usual) and we had a load of worksheets to do again -.-" History was ok. Mr Sharom put the list up showing the total marks for term 3, and minusing the file (5 out of 25 people handed it up, cos Mr Sharom didnt bother to tell the whole class), i got highest in class ^^ Oh yeah fine tie with SLYP but still i am so gonna pull out a GPA 4.0 -nods- Just that the file is gonna be considered late and im gonna have marks deducted =( Sigh and we did guitars for music today! Yay guitars are so much funner than drums, just that their hard to play hmph ;( I wanna play i nice song >.<

Training was horrendous, slacked like -censored-(-censored- i just recovered and was feeling horrible), Jaan crapped at me again - or rather he scolded me telling me what i swam was crap. 1500 breaststroke timetrial pulse - 144. Brendan lapped me -looks upward- Ho hum but i was really beat and well the balls were fun to play with, i was dying of thirst and drowning in my homework now.

Tomorrow there's physics test! Ok all i need to remember is a simple table and V=RI... OK done slack now! yay haha oops must do up hist file darn.

NOW im really not sure what to take next year.

My bro just said he wants to go acsi! Why. My parents must be celebrating hmph.

Im recovered! Yeps 36.5 C. I am so happy. You don't know how fun it is spending one whole day at home just slacking without any of the nasty effects of sickness ^^ Had fun, tomorrow's back to school! Gah shucks don't wanna go back hmph ;( hav the strongest suspicion the math ws is to be gone thru in class hmm. Must call someone. Wonder if i've finished everything yet...

This morning woke up, with a pounding head, aching limbs, sore throat and feeling weak. Gasp i took my temperature, 38.7! Shucks just took again before my dinner (which was at around 8 smth cos i slept like a pig) and it was 39.1 sigh. But the doctor gave me two days MC ^^ I know this is bad of me cos exams are coming soon! But i still wish i can be sick for wed too >.< (its a long day) ah well but im feeling horrible now. Anyway havent finished my math hol homework yet and there's math tomorrow so im glad =) Sigh hope my marks dont suffer and i wanna pull up my grades to at least one GPA 4.0 ;( gotta work harder.

Today was a very very sad day, promising to become even worse till about 2 am tmr when i drop into my bed. Hmm training was ok, free set looked so boring. adv im wasnt much better looking like! Ok so medley was the easiest yay ^^ ok maybe free wasnt really hard just boring, im we did all the normal cruise times for our 24*100 but it was really slack. Mmm i lapped everyone in my group at least once ^^ Sooo i was the only one who made everything including the kicks! Yay but while swimming, i noticed kang my bro and rach swimming breaststroke. Kang was HORRIBLE!! His stroke efficiency was so much better than mine even when im not doing grandma stroke >.< Sigh sad i should stop doing grandma stroke. Yes and kat and i completed the earliest so we were the only ones to do the 50m sprints with fins. She is damn fast hur.

Stoned for the whole day. Havent started on my work. Im in deep shit. Flush it please.

Sigh feeling very bad now hmm. But i shall still blog! =) Ok yest was funfunfun. Yipeee man sheng was making an absolutely fool of himself on the roads, in the bus, and on the cinema steps -.-" Hurhur but he was funny still. And the show was nice, hehe at the horrible scary part, everyone was hunched up and ready to scream haha. Ok funny and i saw SLYP there watching the same movie! In the horrible bayley shirt, but i shouldnt say anything cos ive worn it out before. Ate two small lunches and neoprints were funny! Horrible haha. So we took the bus back at around four and we split up. I followed howe and benh to the cybercafe and watched them play dota. Oh it is soo fun! I wanna play next time =)

AND then, instead of going to training (i saw it was sucky strip dryland), i went to the adam's retreat with benh and ms! The sofa chairs were wonky didnt noe how to operate them until man sheng taught me. Hmm and so we went training at around 5.45? Jaan was MAD. But i shall not elaborate >.< hehe he already has such a bad impression of me =( shouldnt be so bad, must remember. REMIND me.

Today ate there. Uneventful and boring. BUT we played the step thingy later! All five of us stepping on it. Haha but it was five stars and we still got E xP

I might not be able to go training today =( Depends on whether i can finish my book reports fast enough and take the bus to school and come back on time. Whew shouldnt be blogging anyway haha but i just cant bring myself to do work. I find i am the most efficient at night. No suprise really since there's nothing to make me distracted and it's urgent! Haha dont really mind if i dont go, after all i'll still be as slow as ever.

Yay for the hist mind map i got 18/20 ^^ It was a nice suprise since well i havent been doing well. I lost my two marks in the creativity section bleargh. The other sections all got full marks and when the time was up i was worrying that i hadnt put down all the points and facts -.-" I still had half a section worth of points to complete. Goes to show how i dont learn smart (when i even try to learn). And i ALWAYS lose marks for creativity >.<

I am blur. -looks blur-

The holidays are passing by so fast!!! Too fast... Sniff gotta finish my 2 chinese book reports by tmr and then pass up tmr hur. Feeling very lazy. Hmm i hate this erm "specialized" training sets nowadays. I haven't done a stupid heart rate set so far, and all the sets have been, well easy! Wah lau so irritating i mean the only thing that hurts (if anything hurts at all) is my body, what about my lungs!! Grr and if this continues i will be so lactate intolerant that i will die for the next competition. This stupid "specialized" thingy really sucks. Angry angry esp. since i hate doing so much breast. Hmph i really wanna do the adv. im set lor!! Looks fun and tiring enough hee xP Hate this.

And today's 5*400 was very slacky too. Me and kenneth were the only ones at the top and we lapped the others by dont noe how many times haha. Oops and we werent even really tired -.- Aha that's why i say this program sucks. And Brendan is such a big fat CHEATER. Ok now even kenneth noes, he was so pissed haha. Brendan with his remarkable lack of integrity, either pulled the lane rope for the backstroke, or did freestyle!! Lol there was one time where he did freestyle for the entire 75m backstroke leg. -.-" hope he doesnt think we're blind or stupid. Jaan told him to stop pulling the lane rope, AND amazingly right after that for the next lap, he was caught pulling again (by kenneth and me). Such a cheater, tsk tsk. Esp irritating was how he was so brave to do so much free. Hmph he still couldnt keep up hah! Goes to show cheating is bad haha.

Then later for the last set, we did 50s from 25m. That means we did turnings! Haha it was so funny. Poor us. Everytime someone looked towards the wall for back, did u/w kicking for less than 15m, or swam poorly, jaan would throw the board at us! It was soo funny, whenever i got to the wall i wouuld see boards flying here and there and people stopping hahaha. I could hardly stop laughing. Poor su jian got hit every backstroke, and howe was so traumatised, that he stopped going for the backstroke. He would just wait at the 25 -.-" Hur at first i thought the flying boards were birds, until everybody started exclaiming "i got hit!". Funny haha and everybody was slacking so we were having fun together ^^

When i was swimming towards the wall i kept banging into the pullbouys hur. I think Jaan tried to throw some at me, but missed x). I threw them back without looking where they landed. I hope i hit Jaan.

I was looking at my 2 week diary (that was the limit to my discipline haha) just now and i find reading the few entries i have in there very interesting! Hmm pity i stopped. And while ruffling through my drawer, i came upon the envelope holding all the notes i got during the Prelim/PSLE period. Naomi u remember those? Yay and i had so much fun reading them again. And now im feeling very very nostalgic. They were the greatest bunch of friends ive ever had ^^ Haha though i dont think about it, when i read those, i realised i really miss u all and those times!! Sigh pity we had to go to different sec schools, we rocked =( Miss miss miss you all. And when i went back to Tao Nan again FINALLY during teachers' day. I felt very sad haha. Cos everyone and everything's so different. Everybody's so foreign, the teachers, the school, my friends!! That was the reason i didnt want to go back to Tao Nan anymore after last year's second/third? trip. Wish i could go back, it's so sad. Sniff and haha remember Kee En and i used to be the bestest best buds? Now he seems totally foreign to me. Most of my good friends have gone to Chinese High, sigh i think the best of them were, Kee En, Jon Lee and Ben =( Sigh and the people in RI are so different too from last time. I am sad hai. Never realised how much i missed u all >.<

Yay open champs are over. Finally haha. Happy ^^ So today's times were all horrible, except for my 100 free. I didnt do any pbs for all my 50s, and my swims were not very good. But it was fun ^^ Hehe for invitational relay i did 1.04, lose to the others by at least one body length -.-" Embarrasing though i did a 1.03 for the 100 free later ^^ My bro didnt really sprint though, he got 1.04 and i got 3rd ^^ Lol pathetic but i like the medal anyway haha. 400 free i couldnt be bothered to swim fast anymore and i slacked with ben goh hur. Then later we saw my bro slacking and going the same speed as kenneth -.-" he got 5.08. I kicked myself haha i should have sprinted x) Then i would have gotten another medal hmph. Sigh got only $3.00 for gold rush haha all the small little kiddies beat me =(

Decided what to take for next year ^^ 3 sciences and hist yay.

President is only behind by 3 points!!! Grr all kang's and mayumi's fault -glares- xP And we dq so much haha, looks at howe and kang again and possibly myself. Sigh but we must win!! Mako lost last year, i wanna win this year!! But Orion's coming today, shucks someone go steal his trunks or something hur. Please please please we really must win >.< President rocks we must win.

Today was fun ^^ Okay we played badminton for PE and it was so jokes (sounds familiar). Ding and i against the Gay Brigade xP (Slyp gave them the awful name) It was a riot but i think they actually did quite well considering jotty is totally hopeless at badminton, porry too, but then the had Slyp in their team of course. Pffft but then i was worried after that, for my 1500! Pooosh i was thinking i'll break down halfway and i was feeling worse and worse.

And after school there was the captain elections. It was kinda funny, everyone was so serious and erm monotone; except of course for shawn tan, but then he wasnt supposed to run anyway, unfair to those running lor. Haha anyway i voted for -psst psst psst- tada! Poot and then went back to class and found people from other classes trashing it sheesh. Thomas was quite angry hur.

Sigh but then the competition was horrible as it was expected to be. Horrible times, grrr. But i dont feel so bad now haha cos - um i wont say. Sigh my 1500 free was horrible!!! Gaahh horrible as in waste my energy and it got me so tired. For NOTHING!! Sniff i was fighting with howe the whole way, and kang (though he was so obviously mocking us by slacking -.-"). Then in the last 100 everyone sprinted together. And i lost. To both of them. Lost to kang by 0.2, lost to howe by 0.04! He got 19.54:45, i got 19.54:49. Felt so disappointed and tired after that. Sigh now only got one pathetic measley silver medal. I want another one. Sniff sniff tomorrow can? Sigh now i think i noe how peck feels like, swim so hard then still lose. But tomorrow 400 free there's my bro, kang and howe, 50 free even worse got man sheng too. Bleargh i'll just have to try ^^

Haha my marks have been horrible, ive been swimming badly, life is stressful. But i'll still smile -Smile-, hehe. I find i have a happy go lucky attitude, its fun. I hardly get really sad and when ive stored too much, i just let it out! ^^ Much better than last time where i worry worry worry.

The first day of open champs was horrible. Ghastly. Hur i almost cried after the im. But even if i did it would prob turn out to be dry sobs, like this aft. But it was a stupid thing so i shall not say. I have not actually really cried for many months? Wow haha im an emotionless freak, too many disappointments already. But i guess im just used to being a loser after all.

Still haven't started studying for chinese test tomorrow.

I wanna quit.

I just looked at my last post again and decided that it was very vulgar hur. So i censored it xP ok its clean now. Goody forgive me for my bad language. Feeling tired today -.-" wad can u expect with yest's horrifying set, and esp since i was very tired to begin with. Sigh hope i wont die today for the 400 im haha, all i need is to keep up for the 100 fly then everything should be fine ^^ Calmed down about the program already, it should be fun to swim with the kiddies right? Yay kang hope u are feeling better now, u better come!!! Team capt haha or our boys might lose hmph.